My Phone, My Self – One Mom’s Plea to Stop Judging Her!

“Mama, put down your phone.” A small voice peeks over the couch, directing its plea in my direction.

I sigh, put down the phone and cuddle up on the couch, to watch Ninjago once again.

Perhaps my brain will actually turn into goo and leave my body if I have to watch this particular episode one more time.

The media, experts and even my kids tell me I spend way too much time on my iPhone.

And I get it.

From their perspective, I’m tuning out the world and not “living in the present.”

I can hear them echo in my ears, “Bad mom. Bad mom.”

But am I really?

My Phone, My Self - One Mom's Plea to Stop Judging Her!

People are so quick to pass judgement on the mom at the playground who chats on her phone or checks up on Facebook.

However, this may be the only 30 minutes she actually gets to herself in a day to connect with others.

The other hours are dedicated to taking care of her children.

Strangers sometimes give me questioning glances at the grocery store when they see me constantly checking my phone.

I’m actually looking at my grocery list and marking off the items.

My children think I’m not giving them my undivided attention because I check email on my iPhone.

The truth is, work/life balance is a farce.

In today’s society, work/life integration is more realistic.

I get as much as I can done when they’re at school.

Granted, if I checked my phone every five minutes, they may have a case.

But because I sneak in 10 minutes of email while they’re watching cartoons, they get the lion’s share of my attention throughout the afternoon and evening.

Smart phones have changed how we communicate, work and connect.

It has turned into a tool that has become an integral part of my life.

Does this mean I could survive without it? Yes.

Paper grocery lists and hard copies of newspapers still exist.

But because I have a smart phone, my family receives more attention from me.

I no longer have to compartmentalize my time. Instead of disappearing behind a computer for an hour, I can check on my blog community before dinner and bed.

Some day, my children will understand my smart phone allowed me to be with them.

They will understand my phone acts as a newspaper, camera, email inbox, to-do list, calendar (for all four family members), work station, website and telephone.

Besides, I honestly don’t need to watch Ninjago one more time.

I’ve already memorized the episode playing.

Find more insightful parenting tips on Mommy Evolution!

For fun, I thought you’d like to know how people break their iPhones. I don’t see “children” listed.

How People Damage Their iPhones Infographic


  1. Alaina Bullock says:

    This is so true! It may look as though we are “playing” with our phones, if only they knew we are keeping our hectic lives organized and running! (well, most of the time, anyway!) 🙂

    1. Ha! I may be sneaking in a game of Candy Crush once in a while 😉

  2. LOL! Great post! I totally agree! My kids say the same thing! The prob is I use my phone for everything! Shopping, reading, lists, business, communicating….etc. I loved going to a blogging conference and I looked around to see EVERYONE on their phone! WE were still chatting and interacting but Everyone UNDERSTOOD! lol

    1. Right? Right! Our phones are just an extension not ourselves, not a distraction from what we’re doing.

  3. Bianca @ Track Pants and a Tot says:

    Yeah like someone said, not all of us are playing w/ our phones, we’re keeping our lives organized.I do use my phone’s grocery app as well so I’ve probably been given dirty looks too. I’m glad I don’t check my phone much if at all when I’m out w/ friends but I do need to just stop checking my phone every 5 seconds when I’m bored for sure.

    1. As much as my kids may give me a hard time, I love it when they point to my phone and ask me to add “chocolate milk” to the grocery list. Nice try, kids. Maybe next time.

  4. Cool infographic.

    I’m in the process of getting my first smartphone ever, and I’m a bit worried about how it might try to take over my life!

    1. If you’re getting your first smartphone, you’ll probably be like most of my friends… you go crazy in the beginning with apps and whatnot. Then it evens out and you figure out how you’re going to use it for good (not evil) in your daily life.

      1. I reckon it’ll certainly take a while for the novelty to wear off! I expect I shall just be more disappointed by virtue of being able to check up on the ‘still no comments’ situation so many more times per day 😉

        (But yes. Apps. Shiny!)

        1. Ha! Keep away from those comments! It’ll drive you crazy. But it is nice to be able to write down posts whenever the mood strikes you… although it’s not the easiest on a phone.

  5. I have serious addiction issues to my iPhone… I need to be better about leaving it alone to be fully ‘there’ with my kids, but thanks for the reassurance that it actually does create more time for us to be with them because we can be so efficient.

    And I totally agree that W/L integration, not balance, is what it’s all about!

    So glad I met you this weekend! 🙂

    1. Yes. Great to meet you, too. It was so crazy busy, which I wasn’t expecting. I thought I’d be able to sneak in some down time. Thank goodness I had my phone 😉

  6. I too am guilty of spending quite a bit of time on my laptop or on my cell phone. But as a blogger, I feel that I need to be available for my followers. It is my only job at the moment.

    1. I agree that I need to be tagged in with my followers. Actually, using my phone allows me to be with my kids, steal a couple of minutes and then get back to what I was doing. I find that integration is the key. Not having it take over! Keep on blogging.

  7. I am an I-phone-aholic….I admit it…I have even washed my phone (with Lifeproof case) on it. I LOVE my phone. We ride a motorcycle, and I have rigged up a lanyard so it can be nearby…I love to take pictures while we ride….and text, and read facebook, and blog…LOL…So do u think I need to go to I-I (AA)?? Love the infografic…very informative. Popped over from No Minimalist Here Open House.

    1. Now I’m wondering if you’re one of the people who have dropped their phone in the toilet! Ha!

  8. I have yet to become mobile. I do have a prepay phone for work because its an 80 mile drive round trip. The hubby is flew blown into the fast paced world of 3g and I’m hoping it doesn’t spread to me. I enjoy not being plugged in and I know I am a lot with my laptop. I actually wonder if upgrading to a smartphone would give me more free time and feel less plugged in because I wouldn’t have to sit and could do it when I needed to, instead of long stretches.

    1. I think it’s a Catch 22. I feel more plugged in and able to get things done. At the same time, it takes discipline not to always be checking your phone.

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