I’m tired of my child’s special needs.
I’m tired of the way they impede on my life.
I’m tired of the way they impede on my family’s life.
I’m tired of the way they impede on my son’s life.
And honestly, if you were talking with him, he would say he’s pretty darn sick and tired of the way my child’s special needs impede and affect his life, too.
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I’m Tired of My Child’s Special Needs
There are just some days I wish they would all just up and disappear because I’ve had it up to HERE with managing my child’s special needs.
I want to crabby and mean and nasty and let out all of my frustrations and tell them to go stick it where the sun don’t shine!
I’m tired of keeping my cool when I really want to yell.
I’m tired of being the understanding parent when really I’m disappointed we’ve had to leave yet another outing early.
I’m tired of having to thank my other son for being so understanding when I can see he really wants to cry.
I’m tired of exchanging knowing glances with my husband, trying to say everything comforting and loving between us without having the opportunity to say what we think out loud at that moment.
I’m tired of figuring out how to manage these beasts.
I’m so sick and tired of being a responsible adult when it comes to this junk.
Some days, I just want to lie in bed and enjoy the peace and calm and pretend the rest of the world doesn’t exist around me.
And all the while I’m having these feelings, I feel terrible that I’m having these feelings at all.
But you know what… they’re just feelings.
And we all have them!
Yes… it’s the dirty secret many of us never dare to speak.
We have moments where we’re mad our kid has special needs, where we hate how it impacts our daily lives, where we hate how it completely changes our family dynamic.
(And here’s another dirty secret — your child feels the same way sometimes!)
And that’s perfectly normal!
I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t have fleeting moments (or even afternoons) where I felt like this.
The difference is, I don’t allow these feelings to take over.
I don’t allow them to poison all of the fabulous things my son is.
And I don’t ever ever ever express or direct them at my son.
The key is these feelings are often universal for special needs parents.
It’s a tough job!
And there are days that are really really really going to suck! (Did I mention really?)
And you’re going to have to continue in that moment or that day or that week.
What’s a Special Needs Mom to do with these feelings?
Don’t allow these feelings to bubble over into your life.
But don’t bury them either.
When you have a quiet moment… even if it’s taking the dog for a walk around the block, allow yourself to experience your disappointment, frustration, anger.
A friend of mine used to say to me… “You’re allowed a 10-minute pity party.”
During those 10 minutes, let your emotions wash over you. But when the 10 minutes are done, let those emotions wash away.
If you don’t address how you’re feeling, all of that anger, disappointment and frustration will bubble up in ways you won’t even see coming.
Embrace all of those nasty feelings. But then let them go….
Because you still have an awesome kid.
And because you are still an awesome mom.
Read more about special needs parenting:
Sharing Love Abundantly in Special Needs Families: The 5 Love Languages® for Parents Raising Children with DisabilitiesThe Elephant in the Playroom: Ordinary Parents Write Intimately and Honestly About Raising Kids with Special NeedsShut Up About Your Perfect Kid: A Survival Guide for Ordinary Parents of Special ChildrenBetter Than OK: Finding Joy as a Special Needs Parent
Read more articles about special needs parenting on Mommy Evolution!