Remember when Gwyneth Paltrow named her baby girl Apple? People went into an absolute uproar. What on earth was she thinking? However, it seems everyone is giving their children some kooky name nowadays. Hey, I’m no exception. I followed the “last name becomes a first name” route.
A neighbor down the street from me just had a baby and used normal names like Lauren and Annie. As they grow up, they’ll actually have the crazy names that no one used. Brilliant! Meanwhile, Drew Barrymore named her daughter Olive — the 78th most popular name last year for a BOY.
On that note, here are my favorite wacky celebrity baby names out there. Perhaps you may follow this route. I’m sure a child named Blanket won’t get beat up on the playground.
10. Kal-El: Child of actor Nicholas Cage. Named his kid after Superman. Dude. Your baby is not Superman. Get over it.
9. Pilot Inspektor: Child of comedian Jason Lee. Perhaps he should have stopped trying to make us laugh and think more about his kid being called Pilot.
8. Kyd: Child of actors David Duchovny and Tea Leoni. Pronounced “kid.” It’s like they didn’t even try. But at least they can just yell, “Hey, Kyd,” and the kid will respond.
7. Sage Moonblood: Child of actor Sly Stallone. You just know that Rambo had to get some gory detail into his daughter’s name. Moonblood sounds like a kick-ass action flick where the girl takes no prisoners.
6. Prince Michael II/Blanket: Child of (can you guess?) Michael Jackson. Blanket is something you give a child as a present, not as a tease-worthy name. It may have been cute when he was three, but it won’t be when he’s 33.
5. Tu Morrow: Child of Rob Morrow. Some people think puns are the funniest thing ever. They aren’t. Please stop.
4. Moxie Crimefighter: Child of Penn Jillette. I have no idea what to say about this one. Let’s just leave this one alone.
3. Poppy Honey, Daisy Boo, Petal Blossom Rainbow: Children of chef Jamie Oliver. Are these edible flowers? Perhaps he should have stuck to sage, cinnamon and pepper.
2. Moon Unit, Diva Thin Muffin, Dweezil and Ahmet: Children of music pioneer Frank Zappa. Honestly, we shouldn’t expect anything less from Zappa. Do you think it was the drugs talking?
1. Jermajesty: Child of Jermaine Jackson. Before kooky names were commonplace, Jermaine led the charge being so bold as to name his kid royalty. Jermaine Jr. would have been much easier but not nearly as weird and funny.